Lessons on Slowing Down and BE-ing You!
I woke up at 3:45 a.m. A time that had become my new normal wake up time recently instead of my 5:30 or 6:00 a.m.-ish time in the morning. I was now waking up waaay before most folks were moving (in my time zone anyway). Before the birds were awake and singing their beautiful or annoying songs, depending on your perspective... or awakeness. (No predictive text, I did NOT mean awareness. Smh. Stupid smart phone. This technology ain’t go’n worry me Chile.)
After laying in bed for 15 minutes wide awake, it was clear to me that my body was sayin', "Get up Girl." So I did. I popped up quietly out of bed, careful not to awaken my husband (aka ‘My Chocolate’), grabbed my iPad, iPhone, charger and headed upstairs to make some coffee and ice water. (The ice-water being my fave of the two.) I nestled into a comfy seat in my living room so I could get ready to 'do' some writing.
I had already planned on waking up early because I needed to work on my website content before my meeting with my website builder iamannachapman.com. I had some serious work to do since all I had at that point was the unedited 'About Me' content. Oh yeah, and the information for my 'Contact' page.
I was finally tackling the homework list created during a coaching session with my editor sarahkatreenhoggatt.com about a year ago. I began working with Sarah through my publisher luckybatbooks.com, a fabulous publishing company that’s been patiently nurturing me with support since 2011. On my list of to-do’s was the task at hand, to start a website.
I realized this morning that my creative process is much like the process of eating, digesting and eliminating food. My thoughts today have more to do with the elimination/movement process.
Like someone sitting down 'on the thrown' to 'release' the unnecessary toxins from their intestines, I had been sitting down to write my website content, unsuccessfully I might add for weeks or months. Okay, for a year. Sitting there, partially naked, open to what might come out of me. Not realizing that I was 'blocked' from not being 'in the flow'. Countless times I’ve sat on that 'porcelain throne' knowing that I had taken in lots of good stuff and needed things to 'move' so that I could do what I needed to to. I needed to hurry up and get stuff done so that I could get stuff done.
Most of the time those 'throne-visits' only resulted in minimal 'matter' being released – if any at all. I would then have to continue going through my day with the uncomfortable feeling of being 'backed up'.
I didn't understand why things weren't digesting. Why my creative juices weren’t flowing as they should. I'd been regularly meeting with the Divine, reading Words of Life and doing my best to let the Light in me shine but things just weren't happening as they needed to... or so I thought. Never mind that I received this list of to-do's that Sarah and I created together more than a year ago. Hey, don't judge me. Afterall, this article is about slowing down.
Biologically, I am the Queen of Slow. My mama used to say, "Girl, Grandma was slow but she was old!" So here you have a nugget of history spoken eloquently from my mother to confirm the fact that in most instances I am and always have been slow.
Yet, in keeping up with the stuff that I think I have to do, the lies told to me by society and ageism tend to hinder me. Things like, "You're gettin' old Girl so hurry up!" My pride and lingering remnants of perfection also slow me down. Me thinking I've got to think of and choreograph the perfect plan for this new 'movement' rather than by me just going with the flow. By me just trusting God and walking in the Spirit.
I have learned over time that drinking a cup of coffee everyday is good for my digestive health and I happily get my fresh grounds from libertycoffeeroasters.com a black-owned business in Portland, Oregon. Usually after I drink a cup of coffee, I can count on 'moving' within the next 1-3 hours. But recently, I've been drinking my coffee as part of my scripted list of things to 'do' in the morning, you know like, "Wake up. Pray. Brush teeth. Shower. Get dressed. Drink water. Drink coffee. Eat breakfast. Oh! Breathe." Needless to say, my successfully carried out tasks have been anything but successful resulting in a season of 'irregularity'.
So here's what happened today. Today I needed to write an article, amongst other items, to start out my blog posts on my new website. However, today I decided that I wasn't going to worry about gettin'er done. I was just going to be. Me and my Maker had us some quiet time. I posted to the internet. Sipped on my coffee while drinking my water. Not really measuring my time or trying to 'push' out ideas. I hadn’t taken in too much information into my brain nor had I cluttered up my spirit with my spiritual to-do lists.
Then it hit me. It like the 'it' that often follows the quiet sound of "shhh." Yep. I had to go!
After biologically 'releasing' the 'unnatural toxins' of the do's, I could finally transition into 'be' mode. I felt good. At peace. Relaxed. Unclogged. Free. I was breathing. I was living. I was being. And yes Honey Chile... I was finally writing!
This is when I learned the valuable lesson that I'm writing about today, BE-ing is a process of letting things 'flow' and happen naturally, while a DO-ing mode (Why am I so tempted to now call my do's doo-doo? LOL!) is a 'strained' way of trying to make things happen. Things that will eventually happen naturally if we're spiritually and intuitively being.
So with my Sista-Girl tone and in my Wendy Williams voice, I ask you today, "How You Bein'?!"